Population Statistic: Read. React. Repeat.
Tuesday, July 28, 2021

Even if someone had anticipated William Shatner ever doing a sequel to his infamous spoken-word interpretation of “Rocket Man”, I doubt they would have guessed the source material would come from the Republican Party’s newest ex-Governor. Or that Conan O’Brien would be the facilitator of this politico-artistic synthesis.

So if that alone isn’t mind-blowing enough, here’s Sarah Palin’s farewell speech, as channeled through Shatner:

Poetic verse doesn’t make that rambling goodbye to Alaska any more coherent. But as they say, at least it comes with bongos.

Let’s just hope that this is where it ends. Because if Palin does, indeed, make it to the White House, and at the same time Montreal native Shatner fulfills his ambition to become Canadian prime minister, we’ll know where the future North American Cold War will have started…

by Costa Tsiokos, Tue 07/28/2009 10:46pm
Category: Celebrity, Comedy, Politics, Pop Culture
| Permalink | Trackback | Feedback (1)

not s'real
How can someone not have thought of this before: A videogame starring Salvador Dali, set in a level-based world of his surrealistic imagery like melting clocks, spindley-legged boss elephants, and more?

Alas, such a pixelated dreamscape does not exist. Except in the mind of jalonso, who mocked up this theoretical Game Boy title, dubbed “Ledali II: The Crystal Egg”:

Lead Salvador through 12 exiting worlds in search of the Crystal Egg in this sequel to “Ledali: Sir Reel’s Adventure”. Collect eggs as you race the clock and battle new foes and many old ones. New Salvador abilities include slowing time and speed warp.. you’ll need them too if you are ever to collect the Crystal Egg Leda has demanded in return for everlasting love.

An inspired idea, especially that theme of “everlasting love”, which factors into Dali’s body of work. What’s more, Dali practically looked like a videogame character, with that wild moustache and those bugged-out eyes. I think it’s a safe assumption that he’d have been all for this, if he were alive today. He had a penchant for making his mark in other media, including film; as cinematic as games have become nowadays, he’d probably have insisted on designing his digital homage himself.

Accordingly, in keeping with the surreal touch, I don’t think the Salvador character should use weapons, per se. I mean, instead of firing some projectile like the slingshot pictured above, he should, I dunno, rub a dead fish or something as a combat move. The unconventional action agent to fit the in-game reality.

As for matching the iconic Super Mario motif, I think the real-life characters are all in place: Dali as Mario, his wife Gala as the princess (referenced as “Leda” above)…

…And, somewhat grimly, the part of Mario’s brother Luigi would be played by Dali’s older brother, also named Salvador, who died prior to the artist’s birth. I can only imagine how that phantasmical presence would be incorporated into two-player gameplay… (Hey, no one said a Dali scroller would be all fun and whimsy…)

by Costa Tsiokos, Tue 07/28/2009 08:52pm
Category: Creative, Videogames
| Permalink | Trackback | Feedback (2)