In order to boost its ranks of analysts, operatives, and researchers by 50% over the next five years, the Central Intelligence Agency is projecting a looser image to attract potential recruits. Chief tool: A lighthearted personality quiz to see if you’re CIA material.

The quiz also seeks to dispel common myths about what to expect as a government spook. My favorite:

Because of our national security role, CIA applicants must meet specific qualifications — but, don’t worry. Getting caught smoking in high school isn’t enough to disqualify you.

Note the clever wordplay there — it doesn’t specify what you’re caught smoking in high school. I’m thinking they’d let Marlboros slide; other substances, maybe not.

On top of that, the Agency seems to be targeting a curious demographic and personality type:

[Chief of hiring and employee development Tom McCluskey] said the CIA is after the generation that has grown up on the Web. “They were born with ear buds in their ears. They are ADD and it is contagious,” he said, referring to attention deficit disorder. “We need that kind of talent here.”

A premium on spazzoids running our sensitive security operations? I’m not sure, but I have a feeling that the terrorists have won…

Power play percentage + penalty kill percentage = the NHL Special Teams Index. Rankings through yesterday, below. Last week’s leaderboard here.

Couldn’t dodge the STI Number ties this week; there are three instances. As before, higher-ranked power play is the tiebreaker, because I say so. Enjoy!