Population Statistic: Read. React. Repeat.
Thursday, October 26, 2021

Need corroboration that the flannel-heavy grunge look and style are making an early nostalgic comeback?

Here you go: Kurt Cobain has displaced Elvis as the king of dead celebrity moneymakers. (Am I the only one who sees the irony in that story being in USA Today’s “Life” section?)

So then, hello again, heroin chic. I’ll get the spoon…

by Costa Tsiokos, Thu 10/26/2006 11:03:21 PM
Category: Celebrity, Fashion, Pop Culture
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Do you need to buy a copy of Paul Dickson’s “Slang: The Topical Dictionary of Americanisms”?

Find out by testing yourself with this excerpt from the book, highlighting modern-day cube-speak:

Britney: Boy, I needed a break from the cube farm.

Kevin: No kidding! Did you catch the prairie-dogging when Caitlin’s coffee-maker exploded?

Britney: At least it provided a little drama to a morning when I was definitely glazing. Although did you get that weird e-mail that was being forwarded around?

Kevin: No, I think the digital hygienist struck again.

Britney: What are you working on?

Kevin: Oh man, I need to get granular on the latest fire drill.

Britney: Yeah, Irving is such a seagull manager. It’s like, you gotta have triorities with that guy. I can’t believe how long the obfun lasted yesterday, as if we didn’t already have enough to do.

Kevin: At least they served lunch. Did you see Tiffany’s canfusion?

Britney: Yeah, and the catering vultures lurking in the hallway? Don’t those people have any shame?

Kevin: Anyway, there was a cloud of bozone in that room. Where are all our idea hamsters?

Britney: I think they realized working here was a big fat wombat.

Kevin: Amen to that. Well, I guess I better get back to my cube. Nice facemailing with you.

Britney: Excuse me, my cell is vibrating.

Kevin: Shhhh! Don’t go all yellular.

Britney and Kevin exit, stage left. Irving emerges from the shadows by the water cooler. He is their boss.

Irving: Darn those young people. I didn’t understand a word they said!

Confused enough yet? No worries, here’s the standard-English translation. If you actually want to admit that you’re not down with the sound in the office. (I’ll admit, I started to lose comprehension at the “cloud of bozone” stage…)

And if you couldn’t figure out who Britney and Kevin are, then I’m afraid you need more help than any slang guide can offer.

by Costa Tsiokos, Thu 10/26/2006 10:20:15 PM
Category: Comedy, Publishing, Wordsmithing
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Does General Motors know how to target a market, or what?

Observe: Only a couple of days after the World Wildlife Federation declared Australians to be the biggest resource-devouring and waste-producing denizens on the planet, GM decides to introduce its gas-guzzling Hummer line of vehicles Down Under, starting with the right-hand steering-wheeled H3 (yes, they drive on the “wrong” side of the road in Oz).

The timing is comical — it’s almost like GM took the WWF’s environmental condemnation as a seal of approval for Australia as a receptive market. If this isn’t a clear-cut case of cause and effect, by gosh, it oughta be.

by Costa Tsiokos, Thu 10/26/2006 01:46:59 PM
Category: Business, Science, Society
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i, the pod
A couple of days ago, while comment-responding on my post about the iPod’s 5th birthday, I used a unique term to describe Microsoft’s aspirations for its forthcoming Zune media player:

Past the wireless hook, MS is counting on being the “unPod”, thus appealing to people who’ll take anything that’s not Apple.

That “unPod” just came to me. I’d like to take credit for coining it, but of course, someone beat me to that.

Still, a quick Web search indicates it’s not a commonly-employed term. So I’ll gladly post it here, in an effort to have it adopted as the standard descriptor for any portable MP3/media player that doesn’t come from Cupertino. Let the meming begin…

by Costa Tsiokos, Thu 10/26/2006 10:53:26 AM
Category: Tech, Wordsmithing, iPod
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