Population Statistic: Read. React. Repeat.
Friday, September 29, 2021

A rare delving into some of my personal drama, such as it is, through the instant messenger filter.

I usually veer quite clear of this sort of thing when blogging, not so much for my own sense of privacy as for the other party’s. But since I’m still chuckling over it a day later, and it represents a closed chapter, why not:

She: hey, u there
Me: What’s up?
She: call me so I can find my phone
Me: What do you mean?
She: I lost my phone and I need u to call it so when it rings I’ll know where it is
Me: That’s a weird way to locate your phone
Me: How do you know it’s in your house
She: why are u being a jerk?
Me: I’m not
She: just call me why is that a big deal
Me: It’s not, I’m just saying
She: you’re just being a jerk!!!!!
Me: Fine, I’m a jerk
Me: I’m calling you now
She: i don’t hear it
Me: Well, it’s ringing
She: are you really calling
Me: Yes, really, and now it’s going into voicemail
Me: You don’t believe that I’m calling do you?
She: well why should i since you’re being a jerk right now
Me: I’m a jerk because you lost your phone?
She: whatever i can’t hear it
Me: You’ll see I called from the caller ID
She: no message tho right
Me: Why, you know who it is because we’re talking now
She: forget it
Me: You sure it’s turned on?
She: it’s on but maybe to vibrate
Me: Am I still a jerk?
She: [silence]

by Costa Tsiokos, Fri 09/29/2006 05:24pm
Category: Comedy, Tech, Women
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Okay, Beppe Severgnini has convinced me: After I peruse his “La Bella Figura: A Field Guide to the Italian Mind”, I’m going to renew my passport, catch the next flight to Italy, and just take in the action near the gates.

An airport in Italy is violently Italian. It’s a zoo with air conditioning, where the animals don’t bite and only the odd comment is likely to be poisonous. You have to know how to interpret the sounds and signals. Italy is a place where things are always about to happen. Generally, those things are unpredictable. For us, normality is an exception. Do you remember The Terminal? If the film had been set in [Milan's] Malpensa Airport, Tom Hanks wouldn’t just have fallen in love with Catherine Zeta-Jones. He’d have founded a political party, promoted a referendum, opened a restaurant, and organized a farmers’ market…

Malpensa encapsulates the nation. Only a naive observer would mistake this for confusion. Actually, it’s performance art. It’s improvisation by gifted actors. No one believes for one minute he or she is an extra. Everyone’s a star, no matter how modest the part. Federico Fellini would have made a good prime minister, if he’d wanted the job. It takes an outstanding director to govern the Italians.

Go where you can capture the essence of the national character, I say. Kinda like a tour of New Jersey, via the mall circuit.

by Costa Tsiokos, Fri 09/29/2006 08:44am
Category: Comedy, Publishing
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