Population Statistic: Read. React. Repeat.
Friday, March 25, 2021

Here’s a piece of everyday musical randomness: Only a day after penning a post about Terri Schiavo, what should tick up on my computer’s shuffle-set music player?

The Smiths’ “Girlfriend in a Coma”. I don’t put much any credence in such coincidences, but still, freaky.

Anyway, this one’s going out to Michael Schiavo. The lyrics might seem a bit callous, but what the hey:

Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know - it’s serious
Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know - it’s really serious

There were times when I could
Have murdered her
(But you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to her)

No, I don’t want to see her

Do you really think
She’ll pull through?
Do you really think
She’ll pull through?
Do…

Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know - it’s serious
My, my, my, my, my, my baby, goodbye

There were times when I could
Have strangled her
(But you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to her)
Would you please
Let me see her!

Do you really think
She’ll pull through?
Do you really think
She’ll pull through?
Do…
Let me whisper my last goodbyes

I know - it’s serious

- Costa Tsiokos, Fri 03/25/2005 04:26:12 PM
Category: Florida Livin', Society | Permalink | Feedback (1)


chick magnet
Aside from the overt humor, one of the most absurdly funny aspects of “Seinfeld” was the casting of fashion model-quality girlfriends for Jerry and George. This became especially acute in the later seasons, when plausibility was pretty much tossed out the window, in favor of providing eyecandy.

I mean, come on. I could almost see Jerry being able to snag the Calvin Klein models: He’s tall, and the charm/comedy thing would probably mitigate his horsey looks. But George, getting involved with a parade of hotties? Short, fat, bald, glasses, no money… And the girlies are lining up to date him. Only in New York — TV New York, anyway.

I always felt that part of the explanation lay in the acting out of many a Long Island boy’s fantasy: To grow up, move out of Great Neck, get an apartment in Manhattan and date girls that weren’t from your neighborhood.

Anyway, while most of those pretty faces came and went without much fanfare, I’ve noticed that a number of those one-shot girlfriend characters were played by actresses who found Hollywood success apart from “Seinfeld”. Here’s a list of the notables, in no particular order:

- Kristin Davis. Even though Davis had achieved something of a breakthrough with her one-year stint on “Melrose Place” in the mid-’90s, she still hadn’t really made a name for herself when she appeared as “Jenna” in “The Pothole” (reprising the character for a brief cameo in “The Butter Shave”). Shortly after these appearances, she hit it big as Charlotte York on “Sex and the City”.

- Catherine Keener. Keener was just starting out when she got the role of “Nina”, the hyperjealous painter in “The Letter”. Since then, she’s made a mark in independent movies, with her turn in Being John Malkovich bringing her the most critical acclaim.

- Jane Leeves. Had a spotty film and TV career before playing “Marla” in “The Virgin” and “The Contest”. This turned out to be a very lucky break, as the latter episode’s “master of your domain” storyline probably launched the fledgling series into the stratosphere — and the Marla character was integral. Shortly thereafter, Leeves landed the role of Daphne on “Frasier”.

- Debra Messing. Despite a starring role in a short-lived sitcom, Messing wasn’t much of a known quantity when she was cast as “Beth” in “The Wait Out”. She reprised that role a year later in “The Yadda Yadda”. The next year, she got the part of Grace in “Will & Grace”.

- Lauren Graham. The future “Gilmore Girl” got on the Seinfeld merry-go-round as high-maintenance “Valerie” in “The Millenium”.

- Melinda Clarke. Years after a throwaway turn as “Alex” in “The Muffin Tops” — really just one of a string of B-level roles — Clarke finally hit it big recently with “The O.C.”.

- Vickie Lewis. Her role as George’s secretary “Ada” in “The Secretary” and “The Race” wasn’t technically a girlfriend character (even though George did have sex with her). Nevertheless, it served as enough of a launching pad for her to get “NewsRadio” and various film roles afterward.

- Lori Loughlin. Loughlin had already achieved fame on “Full House” and other projects before playing “Patty” in “The Serenity Now” (easily my favorite episode title). Brief as the role was, it might have been enough to lead to her career revival in “Summerland”.

- Helen Slater. This one’s the exception to the rule. Slater’s fame was assured before her appearance — uncredited, no less — as “Becky” in “The Good Samaritan”. She was, of course, Supergirl a decade prior (which perhaps helped her get the girlfriend role, given Jerry Seinfeld’s Superman obsession). In Slater’s case, there hasn’t been much of a “Seinfeld” effect to her subsequent career.

- Teri Hatcher. Probably the most accomplished actress, coming in, to play one of the “Seinfeld” girls. With a career that started on “The Love Boat”, and hit a peak as Lois Lane on “Lois & Clark” (again, the Superman thing!), Hatcher was already a familiar face when she starred as “Sidra” in “The Implant” (role reprised in brief cameos in later episodes). She’s graduated recently to renewed TV stardom in “Desperate Housewives”; and she’s not the only one…

- Marcia Cross. Not only is she a “Melrose Place” alum, along with the aforementioned Kristin Davis; but she’s also riding high with Hatcher as a “Desperate Housewives” vixen. Her “Seinfeld” character was “Dr. Sarah Sitarides” in “The Slicer”.

Quite a lineup: Two “Desperate Housewives”, a “Sex and the City” girl, an “O.C.” vamp… The Sein had it going on!

- Costa Tsiokos, Fri 03/25/2005 01:05:44 PM
Category: TV, Celebrity, Women | Permalink | Feedback (2)