Population Statistic: Read. React. Repeat.
Thursday, December 23, 2021

out damn sin!
My friend Kirby picked up this “Wash Away Your Sins Towelette” at some novelty store, figuring it would be right up my alley.

It was.

Here are the directions for use:

1. Remove moist towelette
2. Devoutly wipe away wrong-doing
3. Spot check for stubborn guilt
4. Wipe again as needed
5. Discard sins in waste receptacle
6. Go forth purified & moisturized

Natural outlet for these soul-scrubbing sanitary naps? Strip clubs, since everything from the girls to the upholstery tends to be iffy, both morally and hygienically. Think of the sense of satisfaction!

In order to wipe out all of my sins, I’d need about a 100-pack of these little things (or maybe a beachtowel-sized version). Fortunately, there’s a wide selection of additional sin-cleaning products.

- Costa Tsiokos, Thu 12/23/2004 03:48:32 PM
Category: Comedy | Permalink |

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