It was only a matter of time before someone in zombie fandom equated “living dead” with “resurrection”, and came up with Zombie Jesus.

Just in time for an Easter origin tale, too:

If I have a basic understanding of the Bible (which I don’t), then I’m pretty sure today is important because Jesus rose from the dead and terrorized those who had cast the first stone within glass houses.

It was only after a man dressed in the skin of a rabbit was able to subdue Our Lord and Savior by hurling eggs at him until he agreed to go to heaven that J.C.’s rampage finally ended.

Even though this theological horror story neatly incorporates the legend of the Easter bunny and Easter eggs, I’m skeptical. Thankfully, I don’t think any of this applies to Greek Orthodox Easter, which I’ll be celebrating next Sunday.