How did the once-lowly flip-flop sandal ascend the fashion ladder? On a faulty premise:

The evolution of flip-flops from geek to chic can be traced to open-toed shoes that prodded women to abandon pantyhose, coinciding with a surge in nail salons and toe rings. Who wants to hide pretty feet? Sections of shoe began disappearing on designers’ drafting boards. Runway models paired the plebian flip-flop with bohemian smocks, then left on the footwear when they donned taffeta for evening. (emphasis mine)

Therein lies the problem: There are really not that many pretty feet out there. In fact, there are far too many downright ugly ones on display, thanks to this open-toed madness. No matter how many $75 pedicures or toerings administered, ugly feet remain ugly feet. The biggest shame of it is, most women are kidding themselves to the contrary (although I suspect that, deep down, they know they’re not pulling it off).

For the record, I eschew sandals of all types myself (not that there’s any other type of exposed men’s footwear, really). And yeah, my feet are pretty butt-ugly too. That’s why I keep them under wraps.